Wednesday, December 31, 2008

The First 5 Games On Kongregate

Hey look! It's almost 2009! Kongregate's come a long, long way since it was first implemented. Better chat, better comments, better profiles, better.. functionality..

And better games. Kongregate is all about games. Without good games, it would be nothing. Since it is something, the games must be good. And they are. It wasn't like that when the site first started. So sit down, make yourself a sandwich, get some water, and enjoy this presentation of the first 5 games on Kongregate.

Where am I going?
I really can't see..
But I think I'll get there
Like a vision-less guppy..

This game is a Helicopter rip-off. It's a really bad helicopter rip-off. In Helicopter, you have to hold your mouse to move up and avoid obstacles and crashing into the ground/ceiling. This game is like that. This would be pretty easy and cool, but the controls don't make any sense in this one. It says you can also move your guppy by moving your mouse left to right, but it sometimes doesn't work. In fact, none of the controls work. You float up until you left-click and then you crash down, sometimes the mouse moves the guppy, sometimes not. This game might have good graphics, but it crashes at actually playing the game.

4. Balloon Go Pop!

Different color balloons show up. A color will show up on the screen and you have to shoot the matching color balloon. The 9th game to get uploaded on Kongregate was Fancy Pants Adventures. Why couldn't it have been in the first 5 so I wouldn't have to play this garbage? This game sucks. Boring graphics, boring gameplay, boring everything.. Next!

3. Food Chain

Surprisingly, this doesn't suck. It's a dog-cat-mouse game where you start off small and eat anything smaller to grow, to either other things. Sound familiar? That's right, it's Spore! It could also be Microbe Kombat, but it's missing a lot of features. Such as abilities and annoying viruses. It's still good. The first game of it's kind on Kongregate, so I have to give it major points with that. I love these types of games, but this is level-based. I wish it had an infinite mode. That would be pretty nice. It gets boring fast, which is it's main problem.

Mini-minions are invading! Are you a bad enough dude to protect the king? What you have to do in this game is hold rocks for resources, then build tower to protect your king. It should be fun, but the game ruins it by including slower and slower mining times as you mine, no replay value, and very repetitve gameplay. The game is confusing, and it took me several tries to figure out how the game works (mostly the archers). There's not even a tutorial mode. Oh, and you can bring the game to a deadlock by building towers around the edge of the universe, but there's no point. The knights will just get angry and spam your chat.


The game is way too hard when you have no archers, and once you do, it's way too easy. The camera is HORRIBLE, since you have to click on a turning button instead of guiding with arrow keys. Too many things that can be improved in this one. This is richpixel's second game. Since this is also the second game on Kongregate, richpixel's first game was the first game on Kongregate. Speaking of which..

On October 10, 2006, this game was launched. Hooray! The first game on Kongregate! It's a Q-Bert rip-off, though. It's still fun. Uses about the same graphics as Micro Seige but not that broken. You have 100 steps of energy. Can you reach the top of the summit? I sure hope so, because you have to climb your way through walls to steep (as shown above) dodge a boulder, and try to get the energy bar so you can continue your journey! This uses the annoying style of walking where instead of walking straight up, you go north-east when you walk up, south-east when you walk right, and so forth. You'll learn to live with it though. This game is pretty fun and challenging at the same time. I can't decide which is better, Crazy Climber or Food Chain. Ah well, it's always nice to see a piece of history. Oh no.. here comes the nostalgia..

The time has come, the walrus said
To talk of many things..
Of shoes and ships and ceiling wax,
Of cabbages and kings..
Any why the sea is boiling hot,
And whether pigs have wings..

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